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Monday, August 30, 2010

How I became the artist again..

I am a makeup artist by trade, was forced into a "norm' job in 2007 to be able to take on being a single mom and being around for my daughter, not off on photo shoots or movie sets. I tried retail cosmetics PLPH! I was the white girl working at the Shiseido counter. but after they refused to move me up because I could not communicate with the asian client that frequented Bloomingdales South Coast Plaza. I was done with my year of retail, (what a step down that was) and began working as a personal asst.. at a small start up company that was run by an on fire black woman who delegated what we did each day for our 10 or so richer then rich clientele. An office of cute girls, rich peoples money to spend and beautiful houses..Well for awhile, then the economy crashed and we lost clients...We had a few still but not enough to keep us from getting laid off for awhile. I was back in a month on a "move" my boss called them.. it set the stage for the most demeaning job i have ever had. Yes more demeaning then being a "stripper" Packing, unpacking, cleaning up Rich peoples garbage that they somehow walk around, through, and lived amongst every single day. They know how to make money, that is it. GROSS! So here i am, forced to wear a red polo and black slacks everyday and what used to be kind of a glamorous job was now "hell". I was an under paid maid in a polo shirt and slacks. Did we get any credit for the stuff that my boss "squeezed" into an action for us, desperate for billable hours? Nope! Not even a Christmas bonus from these people- Anyhooo point being this. That is where I found my self in January of 2010, miserable, and praying to God that there has to be another way! Well, i woke up on a Saturday morning and my left arm from the elbow down decided it all by its lonesome would get me out of that job. It was numb tingling fingertips and it felt wrong. VERY WRONG, more so then any sleeping on a limb wrong could feel like. It didn't come back.. Here I am 33 years old, HEALTHY, single mom with absolutely no assistance financially or otherwise with only one functioning arm. And that is how my Art was blessed back into my life. With out this disease that snuck quietly and faster then lightning into my life I would still be working as a "fancy" maid praying for a way out. So it is not the ultimate way to undergo a life changing career move. Nor is it any where near something pleasant. I have RSD Reflex Sypathtic Dystrophy. 24 hours a day my arm and alot of the rest of my body is in pain. And ill throw this out there, I have state insurance because I am a single mom. If you don't know how awful that is, well you just fell blessed my friend because I dont wish it on anyone. I will not go into specifics to my testings and treatments I have had or not had since february but it is a nightmare. At this point, i am used to the pain, it was a hard journey though, to get to this point. I am a bit OCD and to not be able to brush my hair, do the laundry, the dishes, or give my baby a bath was killing me. My house that i was a FREAK about keeping clean and organized was slowly rustling into tiny piles of shambles and I had no answers. They knew through Neurology tests and such what it wasn't. And the strongest of the pain meds didnt work. Morphine, Oxycontin, Methodone (puck), Pot! Ugh! So as of today my family practitioner and my pain management doctor both know the truth of what is happening in my body. No one else seems to care in the medical world..So i am taking a break from the desperation of trying to get a "formal" diagnosis from a Orthopedic Dr. I know what i have, i know more about the disease the the PA knew when i went into Gateway Medical in Anaheim. Maybe they don't want to diagnos RSD because they would lose money, there is no cure and you cant have surgery so what do they care about giving me answers, They are not going to make any money giving me the answer. Ughh. GOD BLESS YOU! TBContinued LALALA!!


  1. Wow it sounds like you have gone down a rough road but still seem so strong and positive. Medical issues are never easy, especial when the doctors seem to not care. It's sad that health care is marketed and people are making a profile off your health or lack of health. It makes me sick that the government even allows it, but that is another topic.
    I had medical issues as well and went though tons of tests, blood work, etc. to find out they didn't know what was wrong with me either. Years later I am better and strong then doctors thought I would be, so who knows what is going on.
    The biggest things to remember is keep moving forward, stay focused on what you want and know your never alone.

    Much Love,

    P.S. Thank you for signing up for my swap 'Follow that Art Blog!'

  2. Stay positive and never give up. You have your daughter and you have your art.